Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Requested for bro to come along with me so I can walk around the mall and do a lil shopping.. and yes!~ I'm soooooo in the mood to buy.. but disasters keep cummin and cummin... urgh!~

The second I was so excited to start, I pulled along my lil sis..we were walking from shops to shops window shoppiing and stopped by famous amos to get her some cookies,and exactly when I was about to step into Radioactive shop, a familiar face hit me.. and fuck~ it was him, Zhi Da. Told me that he saw me earlier from the escalator (placed at the most shit strategic position which my every single move can be seen perfectly at that angle),and this made me think that he've been out there somewhere out of my sight observing me by far.. and this really freaks me out.. God how I wish he'll just say 'hi' and get lost, but hell no! both of us..erm 3 including my sis were standing like dummies outside radioactive looking so stupid and I really hate that, I wanted to leave so badly~

cherry: um.. I want to walk around with my sis
zhida: no probs, lets go
cherry: NO! what I meant is I WANT TO BUY FEMALE CLOTHINGS..
zhida: Ok, I can give a hand
cherry:Why don't you just LEAVE US ALONE cuz I'm not used to have guys tagging along when I do my shopping

..and I turned myself around and headed right into the shop without bothering what's his next re-action..he stayed outside for a moment but I think he left after that.. if not.. urgh!~ I was hinting and making it so so obvious that I don't wanna have him around and..dumb.. this was the first time ever that I am acting so rude..and right now, I think that that might be the only way..
but still I manage to buy a pair of surf pants that've been longing for and the sizes are available to me.. cuz it's rather difficult to get shorts with non-stretchable fabric that fits me [thanks to my big bum]..love the orangey and yellowish colour.. feeling so summer huh?~

but once I got out of the shop, I don't feel safe anymore.. keep my eyes wide open to see whether he's around the some where.. my mood.. all ruined by him.. shop no longer and returned to the stall, found a shady place to sit so that he can't see me from the higher floors but I know he's somewhere out there.. knew he would pay me a visit down at my counter at any second so I tried my best to pretend as is I'm so busy that I didn't see him there, and guess what.. another guy whom I have no idea who he is walked in and shyly ask whether he can get to know me.. looks really decent but something inside is telling me there must be something wrong, and hell what's more surprising then to know that he's 1 of the Adidas staff.. so there IS something wrong going on.. I get the feeling that they are up to something[indicating Alex and whoever he is].. or was I over-reacting+ hyper sensative? I just need drive those uncomfortable feelings away.. right? so I am thinkiing the right thing..am i not?

and That whoever he is stopped by this morning acting extremely stupid..
asking: so free ar? [when I'm holding a mag in my hands]
no customer mer? [obviously a NO cuz there's just me]
had ur food yet? [when I'm obviously EATING]

answered: what do you think? I'm reading a mag
I don't see anyone else here but me..
um.. I'm eating.. I believe you can see this right?
what are you doing here? don't you think you should leave?

and he's like.. a bit ngong ngong then left.. humph..~



why can't I just concentrate on my job and get it done and go home like what I usually do?!
They make me get sick of Kuantan, I mean really sick hell I swear I'll never be here again.. and that's the only thing I'll ever request from the company... really thought I can get away from him when I get back to KL by not answering his calls and replying his sms-es.. and I thought he is not that dumb not to know that I'm not interested... yes, he can be really sweet at first.. but now this really freaks me out.. and sorry but no, I never showed any inition that I like him or so whatever.. can't just pretend he's not there.. he's walking rounds at that mall for about a whole day.. what if he's there again tomorrow??? urgh?!!!


...................................................................................




Missed home.. missed KL..
That's weird.. cuz I never did when I started this job..not that I remember..

Monday, December 20, 2004

wu liao..
ever seen a person who always
hung onto a wu liao expression..
listening to wu liao songs..
reading wu liao books..
talking wu liao crapz..

well.. tell ya wut.. I'm just as wu liao as that..

CRAP!



waiting for Shadow's arrival.. but I don't think she'll make it.. :) let us meet in our dreams..[more crap] sleep jor gua~ extremely wu liao at the moment.. getting more and more wu liao when I start to think bout how to get thru with tomorrow and anticipating the arrival on a / two to be exact date but not able to celebrate it the way I use to.. so.. so what?! I have no idea.. just feel like digging a hole and bury myself into it.. oopz.. does that means being buried alive? Urgh.. just feel like hiding myself.. that's all.. Missed 2 special dates this year, and 1 next year.. which is my 18th birthday,christmas2004, and new year 2005.. It's not that celebrating with the family is not as fun.. but it's just that.. I really missed all of you.. I'm so used to it, use to the crowd and maybe sometimes the silence..
And yeah, Shadow.. the sad news I was about to tell you is: I won't be back till 3/1/05 ..you guys are going to celeb christmas AND new year without me..have fun~ : ) sui ran ren bu zai,dan xin hai shi zai de!
I'm gonna keep you all waiting for a lil bit longer ..but once I arrive KL I want a room in Redbox to be booked all set to sing~ hehe.. so 'ba bei'
Moods getting weird lately, maybe it was cuz of the 'can never get enough of it' disease.. keep wanting for more holz, holz which is just as relaxing and fun in Penang..are you thinking what I'm thinking? Missed the times so so much ..getting really tired easily lately, and dark circles is getting more n more obvious :( regret not taking the eye massaging tip from Shadow.. humph~


something shit happened this afternoon, Alex showed up.. Nike and Adidas shops sv, yucks.. some sick problems occured the last fair in Sukpa, Kuantan.. which made me feel like throwing up everytime I see his face.. there was never peace.. I spotted him at the escalator which my stall is facing directly at that direction and I saw him there! He's always there.. at the 1st floor which my every movement can be observed, and man I hate that..or maybe he's just used of being there all the time, and I'm over-reacting.. btu I just don't feel comfortable.. not in his presence.. what really shocked me was when he suddenly come over to say hi which I never thought will happen cuz he should be mad at me, and asked whether he can get me dinner, and as usual I rejected.. I always reject more than accepting and hell before he leave, he uttered something.. something which sounds like " why did you threw my name card away?" and how the fuck did he know??!Must be either Chris or Zhi da.. I'm not exactly clumsy that I left it lying on the floor.. did I? it's not as if I threw it right in front of him it's just that.. I've misplaced it somewhere ..on purpose.. didn't make and don't really need to make any explanations which means, yes! I did it, and so what cuz it's not as if I care.. and ended the converstation by 'acting' busy when a customer stopped by.. hell I'm so damn good at that.. and his last words were " I don't like to play games, just wanna be friends" what does that suppose to mean? was feeling as if I was a bitch for a second but I'm as innocent as well.. well... Hey?!~ tho he didn't really did anything which made me feel harrassed.. but it was really disturbing.. and uncomfortable..so I SHOULD stay away.. am I not wrong?.. and hell YES! always follow your precious instincts!!

.. another day to come..

Friday, December 17, 2004

xin qing guai guai de.. ke neng shi tai lei le ba.. Didn't really get a good rest since 13/12 from Penang til 16/12 working in Kuantan right now.. bu guo.. zhe yi ci de lu chen shi rang wo mong xiang neng gou chen zhen le.. ye shi ge fei chang nang wang de yi ci.. :)

In Megamall right now, you kai gong le.. will be working here till the 25th of Dec and will still remain in Kuantan to continue until January in Kuantan Parade.. whihc means I might not be able to celebrate Christmas with you all.. sob*~ :(
Dad's been very unhappy of my vacation to Penang though he didn't tell me exactly why , but mum says maybe he's a bit upset cuz they're working so damn hard and in short of staff and yet I'm still having a jolly good time out.. but well..it's a chance of a lifetime and which only lasted for 3 days, not 3 months..so, I DON'T GIVE A DAMN..

The trip was fantastic!which can hardly be described in words..cuz there'll be too much to say..but if you want to know what we've been doing, you can check out Shadows blogand all thephotos here
What's important is ..we're happy..
we're all really happy..
happy to be together..
happy to be as friends..







Who says we can't take pictures in three's when we need one to carry the camera?


Only pictures are able to tell how great we're feeling with the beaming smiles and laughter.. it was all true from within our hearts..not faking anything at all..that's my definition of true friends..being naturally Myself in their presence.. so comfortable.. so ME! : )

Can you Feel it too?!




That's the way I like it!~ Ah hah Ah hah!~

Sunday, December 12, 2004

5 hours before we gather
9 hours before we dapart
72 hours we're gonna have FUN~

Muahahah!~
We're leaving for Penang~ but oops, will fly myself to Kuantan once I get back till Christmas.. sorry dears, won't be able to enjoy Christmas with you girls.. but it's okay.. :) cuz I'll be back for New Year~

Saturday, December 11, 2004

Lazy to blog ..
vry lazy to blog..
xteremely lazy to blog..

and I'm still blogging...

Seems like Shirley is trying really hard to convince me into getting involved with Elken.. and I think she's gonna be dissapointed by me too, attended the regional awards night and undeniable, it's very impressive, especially those at their 20's who earned more than 20k per month,getting to the chance to meet lots of people..taking part in big occasions..and visited our Elken HQ at old klang road when Shirley and Anne drove us all the way from Midvalley to HQ and back home..

We[chin kuan.me] were paying a visit at the edu fair held at Mv's exhibition hall,till round 3pm when Shirley suddenly called and said she's gonna come and look for me.. and hell knows why did I agreed with that.. it was so damn fake. We're really unlucky dat day, both exhausted from long walks on heels and unconveniently wearing short skirts.. have to drip ourselves in the rain all the way to the car[where Anne parked it so far away].. Can see that Chin Kuan's feelin really uneasy and I'm just not being myself, the conversations were so.. fake.. they were blabbing bout Elken the whole journey back home.. it's just so suffocating, and I guess.. that's the price to pay for a free ride in the rain.. a wrong turn I've made that day.. Got the measurement she wanted[shirley] and started off by AGAIN convincing me to try doing partime with some light products.. and I shut her off by telling her I'm not ready.. they left.. and I'm free.. Have been thinking bout doing partime when I'm steady in coll and be certain of whats in the schedule..not exactlythat harmful.. but mlm isn't as easy as well.. like what Chin Kuan's been saying.. it's kinda scary too.. not the one who's approaching to but the one being approached to..
People's gonna be afraid of you somehow.... humph.. just left it be..I just don't enjoy the sarcasity.. but the society we're in is exactly how it is..



cherry.teng.steph

Steph left early that night, she became such a stranger to me.. or that she've always been one?But still had a nice time with them though the situation becomes a bit formal in a sudden and changes the next minute.. or maybe it was just Teng who've kept me there being close all the while?

Friday, December 10, 2004

Going to meet up Wee Teng and Steph later on at Sg wang and thought of stopping by the cyber to.. take a look at my blog.. hehe.. : ) liked it.. think I've improved for a moment *blekz~ :P well.. still have to meddle with it adding in the photo album and take a look at Joe.. I just can't resist looking at his pictures here

Shadow's already at Bukit Bintang area, a day out with her coll mates after exam.. phew~ :) 11/2 day before we leave for penang.. :) so so excited ler~ but I havent mentioned bout this to my grandma, and she's so excited too..but it's bout my cousins birthday,asking me to help her with the preparations.. dear.. I didn't tell her I'm not gonna be at home on that day.. She's a changed grandma now..well, at least to me.. in the sense that she tends to care, just like this morning.. asking me what I want to have for breakfast and see's whether she can get it for me.. this never actually happened before.. or maybe once in a while when she's in the mood.. and before I came out here, she asked me to return home early cuz she made some herb soup which is really really nutricious and told me that I must have some since I was always outside and really lack of nutrition.. must have these sort of soup to maintain beauty and tenderness of the skin.. erm.. wow.. is she okay? Well, I really DO appreciate that very much :) and sorta like her now.. and worried too.. since age has caught up with her.. and she've just got a report from the clinique sh've been visiting saying that her blood pressure is really high and might get serious if it's out of control.. humph... know she's afraid of this too.. especially when she's really into thos fatty foods.. what can I do to help..?

Hey I realize there's lotsa Joe's crazy fan's out there and Pris from S'pore is one of em.. cool site on Joe.. Oopz 2pm liao~ got to run..

Thursday, December 09, 2004

did I ever mentioned how much I Lurrv Ella? ..haahaha.. here I come again~

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

Phew~ this is my 3rd time to Sg.Wang this week.. and will be going in another two days time.. super huh?~ Wondered how can we always hang out there by doing nothing and stayed for hours and hours.. funny.. Was actually just planning to stop at JJ to get a bottle of nail polish remover and spend rest of the day in Mycafe to finish this piece of crap.. but Jacyn suddenly called and asked me whether can join her at Sg.Wang, again.. and well.. just like usual.. to U village for lunch..had a cheesy ham toast.. and coffee..makes me feel *bloated~ hmm..guess that'll round up my breakfast as well as dinner~ then- walk around.. stalls to stalls.. shops to shops.. oohs and aahs.. but hey, I didn't spend more than RM30 :) so damn proud of myself~ haha cuz wanna save a lil to use on Friday and Sat.. will meet up with Wee Teng and the rest of my ex-colleagues from Mimimomo at Sg.Wang AGAIN.. humph~

Dad took both the kids to K.terrenganu leaving me,myself n I alone at home.. all alone.. so what should I do within my moments of freedom?~ Poor Shadow..sitting for her exams.. Must 'Jia You' lor.. if not dun wan to overnight again.. keke.. just joking ler.. not funny right? Ish~ [talking crap pulak tu] .. Maybe I'll be going thru the same thing as her really soon.. must start college next year dy.. won't let myself berlengah-lengah dy.. like what Ca Po said "to to lai lai mm hai ban fatt" ..

BUT.. at least must let my have some fun .. hope our Penang trip is 'sun sun lei lei'.. really hope to have a real holiday with you guys.. "Gan Bei"~

Monday, December 06, 2004

I didn't breakdown..didn't cry out loud.. but it doesnt mean I'm okay with it..

Gulped down 3 1/2 cans of carlsberg at the beach lasnight , talked lotsa crap..was fucking blur..didnt know what exactly I've done.. don't remember.. cuz all i was thinking is about..
I'll get this over.. I know I'm gonna be a tough girl.. but I won't forget..

Didnt know what to think of right now..hoping that he'll say he doesnt really mean it.. this is like a bad way to comfort myself huh?.. Urgh~!!! hate this!!

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